Britton Peele of GuideLive asks. “Are adults who play ‘ Pokemon Go’ hopeless slackers?”   The Dallas Morning News recently received this comment:  “Games like Pokemon Go are for kids so if you are playing the game you are either a child, or jobless, or a virgin.”  And,  no doubt,  a hopeless slacker.

A month ago, I blogged about Pokemon Go,  pretty much slamming the experience as a Virtual Vacation.  Seemed dangerous to me.  Some players were falling off cliffs, walking into traffic and being snake-bitten. And I was certain people were exchanging the digital drama for real life Adventure.

Pokemon has always been  dear to my heart because of Ryan, my firstborn son’s love for the characters.   As a mother of resilience and determination  — my description of me —  I like to think that I am too strong  to succumb to a video game – especially one that commands so much time and energy.  But this  ‘tough mom’ also wants to be remembered as the ‘fun mom.’  And lately I’ve been noticing my boys are having more fun than I.

I had already downloaded the Pokemon Go app on my phone for Trenton, who is too young to have a phone.   I was curious. I’m the parent and my sons’ well-being is my responsibility!   (Isn’t that what parents say when they are peeking into kids semi-private lives?)

I started to play. Let me re-word that:  I caught the fever!!   And frankly, I have to hold myself back from digging into the app during any moment of down time.  Does this mobile video game get you out of your comfort zone and into a world of fresh air and wonder?  Yep!  Is it a time-sucker?  Absolutely.  But why should this kind of addiction be limited by age?  I still love a good water slide.

It is a parent’s responsibility to investigate the activities that get our kids sidetracked from their work at hand, but it’s also our job to be part of their lives, to experience the AWE of their adventures. I am enjoying this game.   We have some hilarious exchanges talking about it, and frankly, they’re impressed if not totally surprised that “Mom is really into it..”

Does the fact I enjoy Pokemon Go,  make me a hopeless slacker?

Gosh, I hope not.  I’ve got a television show to sell!

Dawn

“These are the times that try men’s souls.”  Thomas Paine, 1776

Why is it always ‘men’s souls’ that are tried?  What about the women?  We are the ones at home with the kids during the long summer days, left to come up with the creative bag of tricks to try to entertain kids and ‘keep them busy.’  It’s exhausting!  They are relentless!  And the most agonizing words you hear from kids, other than “there’s nothing to eat in this house,”  are the words they fire at you:  “I’m bored.”

This is not a statement really, as much as an accusation that you are not doing a good job as head of their personal entertainment committee.  And you didn’t even sign up for the job.      “These are the times that try women’s souls.”  Dawn Hirn, 2016

When you find yourself ready to pull out your hair, save those luscious locks, take a deep breath and possibly a sip of wine, and take a look at our website Ourbackpack.com. Even though we’ve been through the absolute worst any parent can go through, we still find ourselves losing our patience with our kids.

I just came upon the interview we gave to a film production team who was preparing to tell our story on television, and found some valuable take-aways.  Always nice to hear something you said that makes you proud.  (Way too often, I cringe at the  things I’ve said.)

Ron shared these words with the camera:  “Try to be patient with your kids. I don’t have the opportunity anymore to do that with Ryan. If you make it all about obligation with your kids, it will drive them away.  Their peers don’t do that.”

Ron and I decided to commit to a total immersion adventure plan with our boys.  I saw myself tell the film crew:  “Grief is something that never goes away.”  “If you don’t make a conscious effort to spend quality time with them (your kids) it’s not going to happen.  I mean you’ve got to do it now!”   And I saw myself snap my fingers in front of the camera:  “You don’t really have much time with anybody.  They can be taken from you in a snap!”

Next time summer boredom gets the best of you, before you pull your hair out or say something you will regret,  snap your fingers.

And remember!

Dawn

For months your kids have been telling you they cannot WAIT till summer vacation.  And now, they are complaining:  “I’m bored.”  This of course, is your fault.  You know this because they remind you of each family they know that is doing something fabulous every moment.  And  you are not.   Summer vacation: it’s the best of times, it’s the worst of times.  Take a moment to stop and smell the Chlorine.  And remember . . . .

And when your kids get older and have children of their own, pass it on!   Remember, AWE, Adventure with Engagement, includes you!

Dawn

Spiders, needles, clowns – oh my!   Do you have a phobia?  And the bigger question is, “if you don’t, does that mean you are not deep?”   

 We’ve drummed into our children the importance of not speaking to strangers and of course it is for their own good.  Some parents feed a phobia by drawing the line way too deeply in the sand, while others attempt to clarify the warning: “When we are not around, don’t talk to strangers.  But when we are there with you, smile your heads off.”  We are strong believers in the “Be ye kind one to another” Bible verse.  And it has paid off again and again.  

 Studying about the people in the world was not enough for the Hirn family.  We were intent on getting to know them, understanding their strengths and weaknesses, encouraging them in their struggles, sharing their laughs and, on a rare occasion, their disdain.  Some people refuse to take a chance to get to know somebody just on the chance of rejection.   And yes, that happens.  But it should only sting for a moment.  Friendships last much longer.

 When we were in China, we realized how utterly foolish it had been for us to have fear of being the free American in a Communist country.  We had grown to realize the face of communism was ugly years ago, but we also learned very early on that the faces within the Communistic community, were wonderful.  The Chinese people were among the most gracious in the world.  Love and acceptance for our strange American family with three sons,   seemed to pour from their smiles and radiate through their eyes, THREE sons!  In a country with a one-child policy, our double-edged, eye-lidded family was an oddity. 

 Phobias are not exclusively imposed by adults onto children;  But it stands to reason a strong fear is likely to rub off from a parent to a child.    “Don’t talk to strangers” is still a good rule for any child who is ever alone; but, when you are with them, interacting with others seems safe enough.  Build’s confidence, no doubt.

 As you know, “engagement” is a vital component to “adventure.”  A catapult, actually!    And what is a good “Pult” without a hearty “Cata”?   They go together.  Otherwise your adventure is just your version of your story.

My mom always told me to do my best, and talking to strangers is one of those things! Do I embarrass my family from time to time?  Of course!  Not everyone is open to my style of  ‘meet and greet’.  But there is usually a great payoff with the ones who are!   And my strange habits of congeniality seem to have rubbed off on my family.  Not a bad thing, really. 

Have a great weekend.

Dawn