Author: dawnhirn

Family · Travel

Trip Prep (rated PG)

dawnhirnLeave a comment

Ben Franklin said “By failing to prepare, you are preparing to fail.”

Any successful family adventure takes lots of planning to make certain you cover all your bases.   World travel is an adventure, and adventure often takes you on a path off the road of convenience.  We covered everything  with the boys — the good, the bad and the ugly.

Toilets, for instance!  At first, the guys were fascinated to learn Chinese toilets were mostly holes in the ground.  For months before the trip, we were treated to their one-liners about pooping in a hole and their versions of the Chinese Squat.   Boys never seem to run short on Potty humor.

In America we are spoiled by ‘high-rise’ toilets – a rare commodity in China.

Even though we were ready and prepared, we were still surprised.     The Summer Palace, one of the most heavily traveled tourist attractions in China, has a restroom with 22 holes (I counted!) and only 1 ‘high-rise toilet.’   I knew the boys could adapt to anything but was more concerned with what happened afterward.  Going in it was paper; coming out, hand sanitizer.

And I played drill sergeant.

Since hand washing facilities are rare and soap seems to be an endangered species in China,   we prepared by bringing our own paper and hand sanitizer, and when we ran low, we went on our own treasure hunt.  The treasure of course, was paper!

Advanced planning is only a grind if you take it all upon yourself.  We used the roundtable approach to share responsibilities and review what we each needed to contribute to make this a successful experience.

Don’t take pre-trip planning away from your kids.  They need to be involved and educated.  Makes them feel important and giving them responsibilities helps them grow.  In blogs to follow, I’ll go over some of my Trip Prep Tips (try saying that fast five times.)

Talk to you Tuesday!  Dawn.

Encouragement · Parenting

Team Hirn!

dawnhirnLeave a comment

So many have asked me about the difficulty of traveling with family?  They aren’t referring to ‘assigned seating’ but liken it to being herded into a cattle truck.  From some of the videos we posted on Facebook, it’s easy to see there were times where ‘togetherness’ was — well,  over-rated.

Like everything in life, it all depends on your attitude.   Struggling for “me-time” while you are on a family travel adventure is a sure recipe for catastrophe.  We each went through times when we felt like putting each other feet first down  in the old ‘whack-a-mole’ game.

Here’s how we handled it:

We are Team Hirn.  Our team members have a variety of strengths and talents:  We have one leader, (Ron), one motivator and organizer (guess who?), and each of the other team members share the qualities of comedian, entertainer, diplomat, peacemaker, encourager, student optimist, and instigator.

We are Team Hirn.  We have opinions.  We have emotions.  We have arguments.  We have blow-ups.  We have meltdowns.  But in the end, we are each other’s best allies.  We rely on each other when we cannot rely on ourselves.  We pick up each other’s slack.  And when one of us is under attack we have at least four others who are putting on their boxing gloves.

We are Team Hirn.  We started this plan to travel as a family and were determined to see it through.  Team Hirn! The unit is greater than the individual.  But we celebrate the unique qualities of each team member.   The trip together is far greater than the trip alone.

One day you will be sitting on a porch, rocking in a chair thinking of old friends whose names you can no longer remember.  On that day, you will be complaining about too much ‘me-time’!   Hang onto that for later.

Today it’s time to make memories with your family.   Celebrate the insanity!

Talk Friday!

Dawn

Family · Grief · Travel

We’re in the news!

dawnhirnLeave a comment

Yesterday, Alabama’s WSFA’s Judd Davis did a story about our family, what we had endured and how we handled it.  Check it out:

http://www.wsfa.com/story/31313651/al-family-takes-incredible-journey-after-losing-a-child

When we began putting together the pilot for television, Netflix, and Cable TV viewing, we found our story had so many layers:

Overcoming Grief: We had suffered a horrible loss.  As a family, we had worked through the loss and tried to turn it to good, to honor our first born. Each day was painful.  The fire that did such damage to our bodies, did worse damage to our minds as we remembered Ryan.

Promoting Travel: When running away (impossible to do, of course, with three little boys) seemed like the only way out, we ran as a group.  After a tragedy, communication is essential – it’s not easy!   We went ‘hardcore’ into a family relationship situation – traveling together in strange lands with our three boys (and of course Ryan’s little blue backpack) to more than thirty countries, for over six months, and if it is at all possible, we spent what seemed like more than 24 hours a day, more than 7 days a week together!

We were putting our story together to encourage other families to travel but also to show them how much we had gained as a family by our experiences.   This adventure  went way beyond travel.   When it felt more like work than a vacation, we mentally regrouped about our ‘purpose.’ Ultimately, we knew that we wouldn’t have given anything for the memories we made with those we loved most.

Our children are lent to us for just a breath of time.  Don’t let a day go by without talking to them.  Show interest in their lives now!   If you suffer the loss of a child,  spouse, relative or friend, you must work hard not to isolate yourself from those who love you.  There is joy in the world, but you have to look for it.   Live your life for the sake of the one whose life was taken.  

No matter how hard you try to you cannot constantly protect your child.  Trying to do so will make all of you nuts! Let your child discover life, adventure and mystery.   Better still, join them.

Have a great weekend.

Talk Tuesday!

Encouragement · Family · Travel

Powers of prediction.

dawnhirnLeave a comment

Before you take a trip, sharpen your powers of prediction:

  1. When your kids are stuck in the back seat of a car for any length of time, you’ve got a problem. Boredom creates chaos on short trips.   So how can you tolerate a long, worldwide trip?

IMG_7192 copy

IMG_8048days in the camper

Prepare:  And may I add, prepare, prepare.  Do intensive map, cultural and historical studies about places you plan to visit.  We made the kids an important part of the discussion. Pre-departure, each child researched 12 countries(in 12 weeks) each and presented them ‘Toast Masters style’ in front of the family via a ‘speech’ or ‘power point.’ It was a great fun to hear and see what each child found interesting about that country and really hit home when we arrived at ‘their’ country.

En route, when the kids were tired of studying, Ron and I engaged them more.  There will be times when your kids are sick of looking at ‘another museum,’ ‘another temple,’ or ‘another dumpling.’  Arm yourself with ideas;  Trivia details and word games-our fav. is the Alphabet country or capital Game- are fun and interactive and keep their attention.  When we had no more to offer, we grabbed one of the books we brought in the Family pack.

IMG_9062

  1. Backpack contents swell during travel. No law of physics supports this; but it’s true, even if you don’t collect things! I don’t know how this happens but it’s like the socks-in-the-dryer thing:  Put two in only one comes out.

Prepare:    Plan what you are going to bring on your trip,  down to the number of socks.   Don’t stick with ‘pairs’.   Pack the ‘traveler’s pair’ – which is three.  At least you’ll have one foot clean at a time.

3. Pack your backpack a month before you travel, and try living out of it.  You will                  know what you need, what you don’t.  Pack and re-pack.

Screen Shot 2018-01-10 at 2.14.18 PM.png

Prepare:    Leave non-survival stuff at home.  But never, ever forget the blanket.   The first gift you were given at birth was a blanket, and there was a reason.  It’s a great comfort, can become a changing room, a shade from the sun, a place to hide or fake-sleep when you want privacy.  It converts to a pillow, a warm wrap or a back support.

  1. Set down “Do’s and Don’t’s,” but let them run ahead and play.

Prepare:    Bring a ball.

Screen Shot 2018-01-10 at 2.21.29 PM.png

Powers of prediction.  You’ve got them.  Use them.

Talk Friday!  Dawn

Encouragement

Lucky

dawnhirnLeave a comment

The other day somebody mentioned to me how lucky we were to be able to take a trip around the world as a family.   Yes.   We were lucky. But blood, sweat and tears went into the planning of this trip.  Ron and I always had the vision, but after we lost Ryan, it faded along with the rest of our dreams.  For years, we sat at home discussing our ‘former’ vision and  each time we came up with one hundred reasons why we couldn’t-the money, the time, the language, the health issues, the safety of it, and it all boiled down to one word:  fear.  We were letting fear control our lives.

 

 

download

We considered the last time we buckled down to achieve something:  College.  Optometry  School.  Buying or paying off a house. Our marriage. Parenting.  This was tough stuff and we couldn’t have gotten through any of it on ‘intentions’ alone.  It takes the ancient feudal Japanese element of “discipline” to achieve these goals.

images-3

We spent hours together, shuffling numbers, tracking airline offers for discounted tickets, studying countries, travel warnings, checking with the CDC regarding health risks, planning a rigid road school schedule, following airline offers for discounted tickets, and in the meantime found ways to skimp, save and cut corners. We were looking ahead.   Way ahead!

 

If you are struggling with a dream, take little steps.  Ron and I have looked back on the darkest time in our lives when we had trouble getting up in the morning. We solved the problem by getting up in the morning.  Little steps lead to big steps.  And big steps lead to incredible memories.

IMG_3226
Thailand Rain Forest

 

As Billy Joel sings:
“But you know that when the truth is told,
That you can get what you want
Or you can just get old
When will you realize
Vienna waits for you”

So does Russia!  And Thailand, Japan, India, Singapore, China . . . . .

IMG_4992
Red Square-Moscow, Russia. St. Basil’s Cathedral & Kremlin

Great day!

Dawn

Family · Travel

What if we get sick?

dawnhirnLeave a comment

As we prepared for this long trip, well-meaning friends gave us their latest “they say.”  You know:  “They say mosquitoes carry all kinds of diseases, including Malaria, West Nile Virus, Dengue fever, Elephantiasis and Lassa Fever.”   Someone once added “They say only the females bite humans.  Female Mosquitoes don’t make any noise, so you only need to fear the mosquitoes you don’t hear.”  (Say what??)

The CDC is always able to keep you aware of the latest outbreaks and potential threats to your family.  Visit:  www.cdc.gov/travel   before you go.

Nobody should charge out to Guinea, Liberia, Sierra Leone, Nigeria or Senegal;  but just because the place you are going is outside the US, doesn’t mean every country is disease-laden.

On our trip, we visited many burn hospitals to lift the spirits of those who, like us, had suffered horrible burns.  The hospital staffs, doctors and nurses were so gracious to give us their time and their take on medical care and attention, techniques, etc.  The patients we met were receiving the best care.

We carried one large ‘family-sized’ bag with over-the-counter and doctor- prescribed antibiotics and medicines just in case.   Most Asians customarily wear masks to protect those around them from the germs of coughs and colds.  Nevertheless, we each got at least one cold.    And Colton perfected his ‘gag reflex’ during several episodes throwing up. For the most part, the 5 of us were rarely sick traveling to 32 countries in those six month.

We each carried a small bag and each of us was responsible for our teeth, hair and hygiene.  Of course, I made sure of that.  (Thank you, Drill Sergeant!)   I also insisted on bottled water for tooth brushing and when adding lemonade packs.  Hand sanitizer was another must!

Be diligent.  Pay attention to details in your daily travels.  But remember germs.   As they say:   “you only need to fear the ones you don’t hear.”  Ha Ha!   It’s all about hygiene, my friend!

Talk to you Friday!

Dawn

Encouragement · Family · Travel

I’m afraid

dawnhirnLeave a comment

Did you ever play the game where you sit with friends around the table, one person whispers a little story into someone’s ear and it is passed on and on until it returns to the original story teller?  Somehow, during the transfer, the story experiences a metamorphosis and is hardly recognizable when it returns.

In 1980,  Ted Turner pioneered 24-hour news broadcast, and for the good and bad of it, we are being served.   Since 9/11, we anxiously feed off the news provided to us  at ‘the speed of sound,’ but unless it’s breaking news, we are being fed the same stuff with different slants all day and all night.

When you first hear ‘the story’ you are set on edge.  But as the story goes around the table it is amplified, adjusted and augmented.

It’s hard not to project fear into your upcoming trip.  But no one should go blindly on a world adventure.  Do your homework. Before you set sail or spread your wings,  check with the US State Department for updated travel alerts: https://travel.state.gov/content/passports/en/alertswarnings.html

There are places you should not go.  Outside those places, your risk of dying from terrorism is one in 20 million, far exceeding your risk of being struck by lightning, which is one in 5.5 million.

Next week I’ll help you face a few more fears and give you the scoop on Ebola, the Zika Virus, concern over doctors and hospital care for your family, medicines,  fear of the food and the fear of ‘strangers.’

Like Franklin D. Roosevelt said: “The only thing to fear is fear itself.”      (March 4, 1933)

Adventure with Engagement AWE · Family · Travel

Kids. Don’t leave home without ‘em.

dawnhirnLeave a comment

If you want to travel easy, don’t choose Adventure With Engagement.  No AWE for you.  You choose AIL Adventure In Leisure,  which is a total contradiction to Adventure With Engagement.  Too much leisure will make you sick, fat and lazy.   And AIL does not usually include kids.  It’s an adult-only luxury hotel, spa or cruise ship experience, but not the stuff you use to make family memories.  Not lasting ones, anyway.

images

True adventure takes some thought and preparation.  It is never rigid or buttoned-up, and almost always has an element of risk.

IMG_4960.jpg

Don’t go with your gut, which tells you herding your family through Beijing sounds exhausting.  If you leave the kids behind, every day at least once you will say “Oh, I wish so-and-so could have seen that!”   Before you know it, your kids are grown.  You will either have carved out memories or regrets.

IMG_1480.JPG

Kids slow you down.  That’s a good thing on a World adventure because otherwise you tend to speed up to include everything.  Sure,  you may not walk the entire Great Wall of China, but why would you want to?   Take time for snacks and bio breaks.  Stop and smell the Peking Duck!    Resist the list and the urge to answer questions at cocktail parties by playing the  “did you see game?”  This trip never was about crossing destinations off your list.   Life should always be about  experiencing Adventure With Engagement.  And you can do that by using each other’s eyes.

100_3219.JPG

Kids make friends with everyone.      Tyler, Trenton and Colton rarely let shyness stand in their way.  They spoke the languages understood in every country:  Smiles and Soccer.    And through our children, we met some wonderful loving people that we may not have otherwise met.    Which begs the question:  Why don’t they send children to the international diplomatic tables?  Let ‘em bring a ball.

P1190320.JPG

Talk to you again Friday.  And thanks so much for reading my blog.  I hope it inspires you to find your own Adventure With Engagement!

Dawn

Adventure with Engagement AWE · Travel

Got ur Passport?

dawnhirnLeave a comment

Only one-third of Americans have passports, while over three-fourths of those living in Australia,  New Zealand  and England hold passports.  Why?

images

Are Americans more allegiant or just lazy?  Maybe we have everything we need at our fingertips: “from the mountains, the prairies,  the oceans white with foam.”   Travel abroad is an adventure, and adventure is often a challenge.   But we deceive ourselves into thinking a vacation means rest.  Can’t fault us — we work hard!  Problem is, few of us ‘workaholics’ actually quit working on a vacation.   Staring at the beach or a mountaintop,  a valley, or off the deck of a cruise ship is great for a day or two.  Then we slip back into the world of computer workflow.    Our families are once again ‘back-burnered’ while we do this one last thing.

IMG_1160 1.JPG

The adventure lives on and on.  Each opportunity you have to come together with your family, re-tell these stories.  You will have another opportunity to see the experience you remember from their eyes.  It’s bonding!  It’s AWE-some!

Engagement is a huge part of any adventure, and in order to engage, you have to include new people and new viewpoints.  The adventure lives on and on.  Each opportunity you have to come together with your family, re-tell these stories.  You will have another opportunity to see the experience you remember from their eyes.  It’s bonding!  It’s AWE-some!

If you don’t have a passport, get one.  You have a solid bond to a country that has been designed with the sole purpose of offering the “pursuit of happiness” to her people.  How many other countries do that?  Keep your Passport updated and you will be ready to take part in a world adventure,  in minutes!

Error
This video doesn’t exist

Push the years ahead in your mind and look backward from your Assisted Living Center. Will the stories you share be limited to a five-hundred mile radius?

Choose the unknown.  Choose AWE!(Adventure With Engagement)

dawn

Adventure with Engagement AWE · Family · Travel

Hidden Treasure

dawnhirnLeave a comment

When you think of bonding with your family, does it put a knot in your gut? Your husband (or wife) will always be busy. The kids can think of about 250 better things to do than to hang out with their brothers or sisters. If you announce your ‘family time’ plan before you have a plan, you are in for some attitude.

Screen Shot 2017-09-22 at 9.16.16 AM.png

You want an Adventure With Engagement. But what is your plan?

When we announced our plans for a seven-month trip, the boys probably first thought we had lost our minds. Then of course, came denial. During the planning process, they began to show more interest. Of course, it was an ebb and flow, one day studying the countries we would visit with enthusiasm, the next, being hit with reality; they would be away from their friends and comfort blanket of electronics for a good seven months. And we got a lot of attitude.

IMG_1630.jpg

You don’t have to jump right into a world trip, like we did, but unless you take a step toward AWE, you will stay stuck no matter where you go, no matter how long you are gone. There are so many things to do that will drum up AWE in your family:

-At the beach, (or near a stream, lake or river) rent a salt-water metal detector and at low tide push your way onto the shoreline. There is nothing quite as exciting as hearing the sound the detector makes when you find a treasure. No matter how small, it is an adventure you will never forget.

-After a day of treasure hunting, take your family to the beach Souvenir Shops and plunk down a few bucks on some oversized conch shells and other larger shells. I know – it’s not something I would regularly do either. But I know a lady who wakes up before daybreak and “seeds the beach” with these shells.   She gets her cup of coffee and her lounge chair and sits back to watch complete strangers find treasures.

AWE. Adventure with Engagement. Make it part of your family life.

It is where you will find real Hidden Treasure.