Author: dawnhirn

Adventure with Engagement AWE · Family · Travel

Flexible

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“Blessed are the flexible; for though they are often bent out of shape, they shall not be broken.”

Probably won’t find that verse anywhere in the Bible, but it’s good theology.  And certainly good advice for any overwrought mom or dad.

These last days of summer have brought me right back to the good old 24/7 moments with my family when we took our 32 country, around the world adventure.  As I’ve told you, I have new respect for Dickens’ words in his book The Tale of Two Cities: “It was the best of times, it was the worst of times.”  And here’s where I take personal responsibility for “it was the worst of times.”

I can truly admit that there were very few moments in 180 days and nights of our trip that I ever felt it was the worst of times.  Sometimes it was difficult, but isn’t it our job as parents to handle ‘difficult’ with one hand tied behind our backs?   It takes wise hindsight  (I pat myself on the back here) to realize  those times that were most difficult were more so  because I had lost flexibility.

Flexibility in any family travel adventure is vital!   If you see yourself as Captain, imagine  yourself first on the Exxon Valdez and realize, some things are simply unavoidable.  There were days when I did break.  I know that.  Ron knows that.  My kids know that.  But family adventures rarely go according to schedule.  So many of the things I remember – we all remember about the trip – are the things that happened when the schedule went haywire.

If I could have planned every step of the way, I would have missed so much.   We would have crossed every street in Beijing without being terrorized by motorcycles and traffic. We would have never gotten lost.   We would have found our way home ten minutes before we all got tired.  The guys would have loved all the food, no matter how strange it seemed, and they would never have argued or had meltdowns.  Ever!

But as I look back on the footage of our trip now, I realize how perfect those unscripted moments were.  When we checked out our re-runs, we didn’t just notice the one who had a  meltdown;  we noticed the brother reaching out to comfort the brother who was upset.

When it comes to AWE, Adventure With Engagement, focus upon the ‘engagement’ part. Adventures will get you to your destinations faster, but without engagement, you will miss some of the horsing around, jokes, funny mistakes and other ridiculous dilemmas.

Be blessed.  Be flexible.  Cut your family some slack.   After all, without flexibility, even angels’ wings don’t operate properly!

Dawn

Travel

The magic word

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“America!  The land of the free and the home of the brave.”

That is my country!  I am free and I am brave.  And both of those facts hit home when we were headed north crossing the Bulgarian Border. Ron and I were driving a rental car with a German tag, which for some reason aroused suspicion.    As we approached the border, we followed the traffic circle just as we thought we should.  Turns out, we did it wrong and ended up cutting in line.  Now in America, aside from a few stray fingers, you can apologize and laugh it off.  At the Bulgarian border, not so much.

The border guard, angry dude that he was, rushed over to the passenger side of the car.  I rolled down my window and he began screaming.  SCREAMING!   “Turks!  Turks!”    I used my form of international sign language for ‘don’t worry, be happy!’ putting my fingers on the sides of my cheeks and pulling out a smile.  Apparently he didn’t understand my reference or appreciate my effort to bring a little levity into the situation.

The guard hauled back and through the open window, cold-cocked me!  I was stunned. He broke my glasses and my temple was bleeding.  The action that usually follows ‘stunned’ for me is ‘fight’, and in a swift motion I reached out, ripped off his tie and shouted “Americans, Americans!” and whipped out my passport.

When you are on foreign turf, neither word —  Abracadabbra nor Shazam — work as well as the magic word: Americans!   Suddenly there was the guard with a host of superior ‘big shots’ preparing to give us a ‘bloodless escort’ to the front of the line.  They coddled us and apologized profusely.  I gladly returned the guard’s tie and we went on our way.

Thank you America!   Because I belong to the land of the free, I can be brave.  But don’t underestimate the value of a smile.  Just don’t bring it to the Bulgarian border crossing.

Dawn

Adventure with Engagement AWE · Family · Travel

You spent how much??

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Thirty-second summer recap:  Start, now!   Memorable family vacation?

Awkward side-stories that get funnier each time they are remembered? Good!  Now, how much money did you spend doing that? If you had to do it over again, would you?

Was your family trip an AWE trip, or just a get-away?  Mom’s know ‘the beach’ usually means just another kitchen and laundry location.  We have always looked back much more fondly at our Adventures With Engagement–traveling to unknown places with our family-than the long beach naps under the protection of umbrellas and 50 SPF sunscreen.     Nothing wrong with sand and sun, but those memories tend to fade faster than tans.

We’ve already told you the story of traveling with our family through thirty-two countries for six months.  We had an ulterior motive in ‘telling you.’  We hoped you would consider giving your family an adventure of a lifetime like we did.  If the idea still finds you stuck in neutral, consider putting yourself in gear with these facts: We spent about $6500 pp on each RTW airfare and came away with more than a sunburn,  T-shirt and a faded glo-stick;  we got a priceless education and memories carved indelibly into our souls.

Next year consider pulling a Hirn and hitting a new location —  like China, where you will spend under $200 six people for four nights, and dinner of fresh dumplings for six was about $5.  Trying pulling that off at Burger King!

It’s not too early to begin planning your trip now.    Half the fun is the anticipation of the places you will visit.  And you have built-in educational opportunities.  Make it a family goal:  Save your money.  Clip coupons.  Cut back on eating out and buying junk.

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Save your $$ and build a bit of AWE into your trip!

Dawn

Parenting

Signs

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Never have billed myself as an ‘authority on kids.’  But if ‘quality’ is at all determined by ‘quantity of time spent together,’ I would have to admit I have a thing or two to share.

Spending 180 full days and nights with three of my four boys as we visited 32 foreign countries, fast-tracked me through the ‘school of motherhood,’ level 2.  (Level 3, ‘the advanced teen-aged years” I like to refer to as “The Game of Thrones.”  But we’ll discuss that another time.)

There are times when we don’t know what to do with our kids.  There is no letter of explanation accompanying each child, but every mom knows the importance of ‘paying attention to the signs.’  They are useful tools for instructing and directing your kids:

curve.pngRemind them there will be problems.

do not enter.png   Give them boundaries.

detour.pngSometimes, they just need a good ‘re-routing’

When you see the signs of boredom, anticipate a rough road ahead.  Don’t hand them a screen and send them to a quiet place.  “Time Out” is every Level 2 kid’s dream.   Challenge them.  Give them a good detour – something that will broaden their minds and hopefully help somebody along the way.  Your job as a parent is never easy.  Think “Cruise Director on the Titanic.”  But if you teach them respect for the signs,   maybe one day, they will feel obliged to pay attention to your sign:

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Dawn

Adventure with Engagement AWE · Travel

Virtual Vacations

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Augmented Reality – they call it.  “Explore cities and towns where you live — even around the globe, to capture as many Pokemon as you can find.”  That’s the pitch.

Just about the time when cities are trying to pass laws to ban pedestrians from using their cell phones while crossing the street, Nintendo came up with its record-selling mobile game Pokemon-Go.  The concept was brilliant – if not too well thought out.  ‘Get these Millennials off their duffs and out in the open air as they interact with this cell phone game.’  Sales have gone bonkers, and unfortunately, so have a few people.  Some have become so lost in the game they aren’t paying attention to where they are going.

All sorts of strange incidents have happened: people are running into trees, walking into fences, not to mention several of the more tragic stories.

Before you hit ‘download’, consider this: Have you been to the truly amazing places the world has to offer?  Seriously. Your personal memory bank will hold more data than your Pokedex:

Have you taken your family to Old Faithful Geyser at Yellowstone National Park?   It erupts every half-hour to two-hours.  Faithfully.  No download required.

The Grand Canyon?   That’s a real life interactive game – from backpacking to pack-rafting, to day hiking.

Stone Mountain Park in Georgia is the largest exposed piece of granite in the world.  This remarkable mound of rock holds a  nine-story carving of General Robert E. Lee.  But size is all relative.  Only one-third of the mountain is exposed, and the rest is ten miles below ground.      If you want more ‘theme-park activity’, you’ve come to the right place.

No doubt, the Hirn boys will be begging for Pokemon-Go.  But as a group, the Hirn family recommends Adventure With Engagement.  (Engagement with your family beats the socks off Augmented Reality.)   The graphics on your phone just don’t match up to some of the sites we saw: The Tunnel of Love in the Ukraine, the tulip fields in Netherlands;  Mendenhall Ice Caves in Juneau, Alaska; Red Beach in Panjin, China; the Bamboo Forest in Japan,  or Angkor Wat in Cambodia.

Take the opportunity to travel, to see first-hand the wonders of the world with those you love.   Nothing you can capture can match those long term memories.

Including Pikachu.

Dawn

Encouragement

Backpacks

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Some call them ‘suitcases’, some call them ‘totes’.  Some carry ‘baggage’.  Some are given superlatives: biggest, fullest, lightest, heaviest.  Others not so much.  But what you choose to pack inside, dictates the size, and often what condition you will be in when you ‘get to where you are going.’   Almost always you can tell from the face of the ‘carrier’ what is in their backpack.

America has recently endured some horrific incidents of murder.  Psychiatrists and those who have dealt with mental health issues try to explain away the reasons behind the anger . . . but nobody ever really knows.   Families – wives, children, mothers, fathers, sisters and brothers have been left asking ‘why?’.   The pain is something they will carry the rest of their lives.

Chief of Police, David Brown has led his officers through the recent Dallas ordeal with dignity and honor.  We don’t know what kind of ‘backpack’ he carries; but we do know he comes with some painful baggage.  In 1991, his younger brother Kevin was shot by drug dealers.  On Father’s Day 2010, in a PCP-induced state, his 27-year old son and namesake, shot and killed two men.  He was killed in an ensuing police shootout, a dreadful message to take to his father,  who had been Police Chief only seven weeks.

And yet during this slaughter of Policemen in Dallas, Texas, David Brown didn’t open his backpack to spread messages of anger and hatred for the murder; nor did he insight more riots and inflate the issue into one of race. He said:  “We are heartbroken.  All I know is this (divisiveness) must stop.”

Check your backpack:  more than the size or the appearance, check what’s inside.  Like us, millions of others suffer from unexplained circumstances and loss.  But if you find anger or hatred in your backpack, it’s time to look up the word: “jettison”.

Fill your backpack with hope and encouragement for those who will follow behind you.  And share this message with those you love.

Dawn

Grief · Parenting

Mama Bear

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I taught Ryan how to swim before he could walk.  I nursed each of my children for over a year to build immunities.   I had Ryan inoculated against diseases. I gave him healthy foods, used every child-proof gadget available, always put him in a child-safe car seat, and suited him up with a helmet, knee pads and SPF 50.  And I encouraged him every day of life and stood beside him in each disappointment.

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So, why couldn’t I save him from death?

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The guilt came when the shock wore off and has been a companion of mine ever since.  Some days ‘guilt’ operates in my subconscious; others it marches straight out ahead of me.  And believe me, that is not an easy place to be. So I stay busy- running here, running there, running for exercise and running for ‘running’s sake.’ And yet . . . .

The accident.  “It all happened so quickly.” ( Isn’t that what people usually say? )  Thinking backward now, what sounded like a gun blast, was a tire blowing apart causing the car to spiral out of control.   We rolled over and over landing passenger side down on the grass.   Complete silence was filled with suffocating smoke.   The pain from my legs being on fire was almost unbearable, but I knew it was only a matter of time before the fire overtook us all and I had to get to my children!  In pure panic, I fought my way out of the car knowing I had to find another way in to break my children free.   Parents are trained by flight attendants “in case of emergency, place the mask over your face first; then help those around you.”

IMG_5046.jpgI was on fire.   There was no time to stop, drop and roll when it comes to saving your children.  But if the fire consumed me, who would save them? Ron had gotten 2 yr. old Tyler out so he could fight his way through the fire to grab Ryan, who was in shock, unable to react to Ron’s shouts to unbuckle his seatbelt.

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We failed.   Everything we did wasn’t enough, and we lost our little boy.

The years since have been plagued with “why’s and if-only’s.”  Every day of our lives we will be in ‘restoration mode.’

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If I can ease the pain of one parent who has experienced this sort of tragedy, the book I am writing about the ‘gifts I have received from my great loss’ will be worth it.    More to follow.

Dawn

Encouragement · Travel

Laugh. Hard and often!

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“Laughter is an instant vacation,” said  Milton Berle, one of the great television pioneers.

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Today I am writing a continuation to Friday’s post:  “Say What?”   American advertising geniuses are paid millions to come up with great advertising slogans.  Sometimes they are unrecognizable when they wash up on foreign shores:

A famous drug company marketed a new remedy in the United Arab Emirates. To avoid any mistakes,  they used pictures. The first picture was of someone ill, the next picture showed the person taking the medication, the last picture showed them looking well. What they forgot is that in the Arab world people read from right to left!

Coors the American brewer went flat in Spain when their hip phrase “Turn It Loose” came out as “Get Diarrhea.”

When Pepsi started a marketing campaign in Taiwan, the translation of the Pepsi slogan “Come Alive with the Pepsi Generation” came out as “Pepsi will bring your ancestors back from the dead.”

Chicken-man Frank Purdue’s slogan, “It takes a tough man to make a tender chicken,” got badly mangled in a Spanish translation. A photo of Purdue with one of his birds appeared on billboards all over Mexico with a caption that translated as “It takes a hard man to make a chicken affectionate.”

Jolly Green Giant translated into Arabic means “Intimidating Green Ogre.”

In Italy, a campaign for Schweppes Tonic Water translated the name into Schweppes Toilet Water!  Bet that drove sales – the other way!

On packaging for a Rowenta iron – DO NOT IRON CLOTHES ON BODY.   Sadly, I don’t think this was a translation issue.  Good to know though.

Translation is tricky.  Language should never be a barrier that stops you from trying to interact with those whose culture you don’t understand.   Kindness is the international language.  So is the smile.  And if you make a foolish mistake, like we did constantly, you can offer them the gift of an ‘instant vacation’ — laughter!

Laugh.  Hard and often!

Dawn

Travel

Say what??

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When we were traveling, we were particularly drawn to American companies that ‘made it big’ across the pond.(s)    This week our Facebook posts a photo of our guys standing in front of two American fast-food-chains that have made it big in China:  Kentucky Fried Chicken and Subway.  (Check Facebook:  Ourbackpack).    Ever wonder how much American marketer’s catch-phrases would be lost in translation?  Me too. “Finger-Lickin’Good” translated to  “Eat Your Fingers Off,” was a good start.

I dug further:

When Coca Cola was first introduced into China they named it “Ke-Kou-Ke-La.”  Unfortunately, the Coke company did not discover until after thousands of signs had been printed,  that the phrase means “bite the wax tadpole.” Coke then researched 40,000 Chinese characters and found a close phonetic equivalent: Ko-Kou-Ko-Le, which can be roughly translated as “happiness in the mouth.”   Of course the ‘happiness in your mouth’ is only a plus for your dentist who get’s the benefit of correcting the ‘happiness damage.’

When Braniff Airlines translated a slogan touting its upholstery, “Fly in leather,” it came out in Spanish as “Fly naked.”

Colgate introduced a toothpaste in France called Cue, the name of a notorious porno magazine.

The American Dairy Association’s huge success with its campaign “Got Milk?” prompted them to expand advertising to Mexico. It was soon brought to their attention that the Spanish translation read “Are you lactating?”

Ford seemed to have a problem in Brazil where sales of the Pinto flopped. On investigation the company found out that Pinto was Brazilian slang for “tiny male genitals.” Ford pried the nameplates off each and every Pinto, and substituted the word: Corcel, which means “horse.”

And my favorite:  Scandinavian vacuum manufacturer Electrolux used the following American marketing idea, and wrote: “Nothing sucks like an Electrolux.”

Honestly, there’s so much more to share, so I’ll save it for next week.  This weekend we will be celebrating the fact that – though we adored seeing the world – we are hopelessly in love with the Land of the Free.  Thank God for your heritage.  And God Bless America!

Dawn

Adventure with Engagement AWE · Parenting

Snap!

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“These are the times that try men’s souls.”  Thomas Paine, 1776

Why is it always ‘men’s souls’ that are tried?  What about the women?  We are the ones at home with the kids during the long summer days, left to come up with the creative bag of tricks to try to entertain kids and ‘keep them busy.’  It’s exhausting!  They are relentless!  And the most agonizing words you hear from kids, other than “there’s nothing to eat in this house,”  are the words they fire at you:  “I’m bored.”

This is not a statement really, as much as an accusation that you are not doing a good job as head of their personal entertainment committee.  And you didn’t even sign up for the job.      “These are the times that try women’s souls.”  Dawn Hirn, 2016

When you find yourself ready to pull out your hair, save those luscious locks, take a deep breath and possibly a sip of wine, and take a look at our website Ourbackpack.com. Even though we’ve been through the absolute worst any parent can go through, we still find ourselves losing our patience with our kids.

I just came upon the interview we gave to a film production team who was preparing to tell our story on television, and found some valuable take-aways.  Always nice to hear something you said that makes you proud.  (Way too often, I cringe at the  things I’ve said.)

Ron shared these words with the camera:  “Try to be patient with your kids. I don’t have the opportunity anymore to do that with Ryan. If you make it all about obligation with your kids, it will drive them away.  Their peers don’t do that.”

Ron and I decided to commit to a total immersion adventure plan with our boys.  I saw myself tell the film crew:  “Grief is something that never goes away.”  “If you don’t make a conscious effort to spend quality time with them (your kids) it’s not going to happen.  I mean you’ve got to do it now!”   And I saw myself snap my fingers in front of the camera:  “You don’t really have much time with anybody.  They can be taken from you in a snap!”

Next time summer boredom gets the best of you, before you pull your hair out or say something you will regret,  snap your fingers.

And remember!

Dawn